At times I'm amazed at how blank my brain can be. Apparently, one isn't supposed to wrestle while having inflamed corneal abrasions. One is also supposed to know that severe eye pain means that the eye is injured in some way. However, I assumed watery, itchy eyes accompanied by runny nose and sinus pressure with some pain were allergies and sinus symptoms. Apparently, my brain has not worked in 6 months, LOL. I swear I'm the dumbest genius I know. Well, it reasonable to think that I'd be good at something, LOL. At least there's a Chinese buffet close by. Cheers
One day, six years ago, I considered the possibility of taking a trip somewhere alone, just me. My brain had a difficult time deciding if it was a selfish act or if I was actually worthy of being able to do something that was just for me alone. Several days went by and I was told, by probably the only person I trust 100% in the world, "you're going on a trip, get online and find something, NOW". So I did. Once upon a time when I was naive enough to believe that I could do and be anything I wanted, I had a map of the world. I would research places and place a star sticker on that spot. I dreamed about traveling the world. As I aged, I became less focused on my own desires. So, here was an opportunity to live out something that I once dared to dream about. Within the confines of the United States, there are so many stars on my map. Art and culture have always been natural interests, for me. I came across a pic of the space needle and I thought, I know where that is. Of course the city it's located in was starred on my map. Later on I saw a program on TV about Chihuley glass. I've been familiar with his work since I was a teenager. So, immediately, I stopped what I was doing and grabbed my phone. Within 10 or 15 minutes I found a package to Seattle. Later that night, I booked it. I was smiling for days, just at the thought that I was actually getting to do this. A month later, i was boarding a plane to a destination that I had always wanted to visit. The moment I stepped off the plane at SeaTac, I felt like I was walking on air. Originally from Louisiana and now living in Kentucky for several years, I was now in an environment that was so foreign to me. I have never seen a place so green in November, lol. The air was so clean, my allergies had cleared up within the same day I arrived. I stayed near the airport in a mom and pop motel. I used public transportation to get around. I did visit some tourist attractions. That being said, I've always wanted to see the space needle and Dale Chihuley's work. Other than dinning in a revolving restaurant, I spent a lot of my time in markets and local shops, grocery stores, doing things that locals do. Lots of walking. It seemed normal to walk a mile to get somewhere. I loved that there was no sun in my eyes and it was cold enough to be active and not pour sweat. 4 years later I visited this city again twice within the same year in hopes of relocating there. I was determined that this would be my new home. Well, life along with new acquaintances I had made along the way, would have something to say about that. Mainly, it's on the other side of the country from most people I know. It's been 2 years since my last visit. I've decided my next trip to Seattle will be a permanent one. It's what I want. There's very little sun, temperatures are mild(in my opinion), the air is fresh and clean, trees and mountains everywhere I look. This place made me feel alive for the first time in along time. That's something I want to feel every day. The company chain I currently work for only has one store near the area. Getting a transfer may be a long shot. But I'm determined to make this happen for myself. I can't think of anywhere else I'd rather be right now.
Life, at times, often disrupts my desires through circumstances beyond my control. I, however, refuse to be denied what I yern to have in this life. I will arrive at my destination eventually. Focussed, driven by passion and conviction, determined to conquer my fears, I will take back what has always been mine. Love is love. Love is life. Love is always true. One day I'll awaken to see emerald evergreen forests, sparkling clean waters, the sun hidden by clouds of grey and finally, I'll be where I have longed to be for so long. It's impossible to be where everyone else is. So, I'll be where my heart is.
Dudes need to clip their toenails. I'll be bringing clippers with me next time.
When finding difficulty understanding someone else's thinking and behavior, face a mirror and look within. You'll find all the answers staring back at you. - J. McDowell